New column featured in Southern Torch offers hope, understanding

Editor’s Note

Diego Reynoso is a 33-year-old cancer survivor and our Manager of Operations. He handles delivery, distribution, route design, subscriptions and placement, relocation and maintenance of news racks. He is also our unofficial tech/computer expert and can repair anything with parts. He’s a handy guy to have around to say the least.

With all that he does already, the idea asking if he would like to do any writing never really crossed our minds. So when he submitted this, what is now his first column, we were surprised. He said he felt like what he knows and has lived through might benefit those among our readership and beyond who are dealing with cancer or have a family member who is dealing with cancer.

In this column and those to follow, Diego hopes to serve as a resource to you—to provide answers and understanding to some of the many difficult questions he and his loved ones have faced themselves. We urge any who might be looking for answers or help understanding cancer to submit your questions, comments or concerns to diego@southerntorch.com so that he can answer your questions (anonymity will be completely respected) in future columns and share the insight with other readers.

By Diego Reynoso

I woke up from a deep sleep noticing my wife’s face. It was the first time I have ever seen fear in her eyes. Ever. She is a strong woman. I guess I knew something was wrong but never knew what was about to happen.

I’d just woken from my colonoscopy and the doctor informed me he found a tumor. And he was certain it was cancer. He sent me to a surgeon. I was diagnosed after surgery with Stage 4 colorectal cancer before my 31st birthday. It was a disease I knew nothing about. My only frame of reference was that my father passed in Oct, 2009 with stage 4 pancreatic cancer. So I thought I knew a lot—little did I know, I knew nothing at all.

My name is Diego. And I’m going to tell you my story in hopes that it might help you.

Even if it only helps just a bit. I have come to learn over the past few years that

every little thing helps. No matter if it is from family or even a stranger. Maybe I can be your stranger. Maybe by telling my story and answering your questions in this column, it will help you. If you have questions, please ask them.

I am a normal guy from a small town. I have worked full-time since I turned 16 years old. I am married to a beautiful woman and I have wonderful kids. So besides a few quirks here and there, I’m pretty normal. Fast forward to my diagnosis and that’s where normal became chaotic.

Everything was coming at me so fast. From phone calls, to doctors. It was total chaos. My head was spinning. I thought since I helped my dad with his cancer before he passed I could handle it. Not once did I show emotion or ask for help. I waited till I was alone to let go and that was a rare thing, kinda like a blue moon. It took me hitting bottom of the emotional barrel before I asked for help. Opening up to someone isn’t a strong suit of mine but I had to if I was gonna stay sane.

Now there is a lot of people can help someone cope with tragedy. And by all means

seek them out if you can or want to. I took the path I trusted more. My wife was there for me from the beginning and she still is now so the logical choice was right in front of me.

And she helped me like no other could. I didn’t want or need someone to do things  for me. I needed a shoulder. She was there. She was my rock and continues till this day.

So I guess what I’m saying is this. If you’re in the same place I was then, and you need that rock? I can almost promise you someone is there. Reach out. Someone will pull you back up. Even if you have never needed help a day in your life before, you will now. Even if you don’t have a spouse like mine, you can and must need someone to help—and help is out there. I even turned to the other patients at times when my wife couldn’t. Which she always could but she couldn’t relate on certain things. So what better person to ask than someone who has been there.

No matter how strong or independent you are, the point is that you cannot do this by yourself. No one can. Don’t be afraid to ask for help. It’s cancer. Remember if you have any questions or thoughts, email me at diego@southerntorch.com, and I will do my best to respond to all and where appropriate answer them in this column.  possibly answer them here. Thanks for listening.