From Darkness to Light
By Diego Reynoso,
It has been awhile since I’ve reached out to the readers and followers of my journey. As I have mentioned before in my writings, I will have to do some form of maintenance chemo for the rest of my life. Also as of right now, every 3 months I have to have a PET scan to see if my cancer has returned.
As long as I have been doing this, you would think that every time I have a scan I would handle it like a champ. Sadly every time I get nervous, almost scared at times. This time was no different. In fact, I had every reason to feel that way. You see, my cancer had returned.
It was present between my lungs, around my entry port to my liver and under my left arm. While the cancer has always been present between my lungs and near my liver, the cancer under my arm was new. It is scary to know it went to a new place. Although, I know it will happen at times.
I guess a part of me feels that, if it can spread to a new area of my body, then what keeps the disease from spreading all over my body? This was a few weeks ago when I found out.
The last aggressive chemo I was on had some major side effects. I know I mentioned the skin peeling on my feet and hands before, and believe me when I say it is a bad side effect. It was painful. So bad at times I couldn’t even walk or even open bottles. Not to mention the nauseous feeling I would get that would make it hard to do anything as well.
Since I had these concerns about the side effects, the doctors wanted to try a new treatment. To do this, they needed to do a test I was unfamiliar with. Kras mutation is a test they do to see if my cancer had evolved for a lack of a better term. The test was negative which was a blessing. A negative meant that they could do more to treat it.
So since it was negative they put me on a new chemo called Erbitux. They wanted to try this because the side effects are supposed to be better. And for the most part they are. Although it does have its own types of side effects as well. Largely, the most common side effect is a rash. Almost like acne but magnify it by about maybe 100. It caused that acne like rash to be painful. And on top of that it is not just localized to just my face, in fact it’s all over my head back and chest. I can scrub my face and I hurt or I bleed. And being that treatment lowers clotting factors in individuals then it takes longer for it to stop bleeding.
But even though all this is happening, I am grateful. Because I have my support system in my family and friends. My wife and kids know what to do when it comes to making me feel better. They have always been my rock in times of desperation.
You see I have been in those dark places. And every time the darkness takes over my family always has that light to guide me back. I wouldn’t be able to continue without them. So every week that I go for treatment, I don’t have to worry how things will go because I know they will be there to help me through it all.
As I close this article out I want you to remember this: You are not alone in this fight you are facing. You have family and friends that can help. Or even if you want to talk to someone who has went through it or went through something similar then all you have to do is ask.
So keep your head high and don’t give up! Until next time….